Nuthin sez claz like a vanytie playt.

Saw this one at the Barnes & Noble in Omaha. It's a black Chrysler 300 with GOLD accents. GOLD! As if that weren't tacky enough on its own, the owner decided to declare his (and of course it's a him) status with a misspelled license plate. Awesome.

I'd love to meet the dude who posted this.

I'm surprised "required" is correct and "access" is not. Weird.

Oh, Jaylynn . . . what a classy name!

A friend and I were talking the other day about baby names. I tend to be a fan of traditional names, and am even completely fine with trendy, Must-See-TV-inspired names like Addison and Bailey. I DO, however, go completely nuts when people think the best way to make their kids *unique* is to bastardize the spelling of a name or (so much worse) make up a name completely.

If you do this to your child, I promise you, I will LAUGH at them if I ever meet them. "Deztynni, huh? That's absolutely lovely. Oh, you think she has a future in show business. Me too . . . I see a brass pole and a set of pasties as part of her (ahem) deztynni."

Anyway, here is one of my favorite baby-naming commentary sites. All examples are from message boards where women are genuinely proposing absolute verbal abominations be bestowed upon innocent newborns. Yeah, I get it. Kids make you fat. They put you through much pain and heartache. But seriously, try punishing them with guilt and shame later, like every other mother. Don't stick them with a stupid name. That's just mean.

The snarky comments are from some genius woman who feels the same way I do.

Enjoy.

STPD PLT?

Vanity plates are dumb. I've never liked them. Even clever ones (like one I saw recently that had eight consecutive Zs) are stupid, because it means the driver actually took time to think about how he would express himself via license plate. This guy (in a pickup . . . surprise!) thought he'd take the lazy redneck stereotype even further.

At first I thought maybe he was physicist or something. Then the Bass Pro Shops decal caught my eye. My thoughts went something like this:

"Ohhhhh . . . Fishing. Not fission. That's dumb."

We don't care that this dude likes to fish. I could have inferred that 100 other ways without seeing it in condensed plate-print. Granted, it's not the dumbest vanity plate ever (DDYS GRL takes the cake, me thinks), but it got on my nerves in a big way.

Feel free to submit the dumbest vanity plate you see so that we can all mock it. Yay for acting superior!